Signs of improvement

I do feel guilty for inflicting my last whinge on you. Blimey, I shall have to do double the blessing counting if we’re to get through even the beginning of autumn in any sort of shape. Thanks for all your kind words and I’ll try not to do it again. I was going to counteract all that yucky self-pity with some lovely pictures today, of the roses blooming in my gorgeous little garden, but of course it’s lashing with rain and gloomier than Gordon Brown.

Instead, I’m presenting you with this chirpy list of advertising hoardings from my dear friend E in Brussels. I believe I’m right in saying that she, or her spies, have seen every single one of these signs with their very own eyes.

Sign over a gynecologist’s office:’Dr. Jones, at your cervix.’**************************

On a maternity room door:’Push. Push. Push.’**************************

In a podiatrist’s office:’Time wounds all heels.’**************************
On a septic tank truck:Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels**************************
On a plumber’s truck:’We repair what your husband fixed.’**************************
On another plumber’s truck:’Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.’**************************
On a church’s bill board:’7 days without God makes one weak.’**************************
At a tyre store, ‘Invite us to your next blowout.’**************************
On an electrician’s truck:’Let us remove your shorts.’**************************
At an optometrist’s office:’If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.’**************************
On a taxidermist’s window:’We really know our stuff.’**************************
On a fence:’Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!’**************************
At a car dealership:’The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.’**************************
Outside a car exhaust store:’No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.’**************************
In a vet’s waiting room:’Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!’**************************
In a sestaurant window:’Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.’**************************
In the front yard of a funeral home:’Drive carefully. We’ll wait.’**************************
And don’t forget the sign at a radiator shop:’Best place in town to take a leak.’**********************

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