Just what the doctor would have ordered if he hadn’t been too pig-headed to see us

Thank God, Child Two is feeling a lot better this morning. This is not due to the concerned attentions of our GP, I should point out. When I rang yesterday to get her an appointment, I could almost hear the receptionist backing away when I mentioned the words ‘Dulwich’ and ‘Fever’. ‘Don’t come here, don’t call us, we’ll call you,’ was the message I got loud and clear. I rang back several times but they were obviously hosing the place down with disinfectant. Finally, the doctor rang me at 4pm and told me to alternate Calpol with Neurofen. Thanks, but even Mme Bovary the cat had suggested that the day before. He then said I should double all the dosages and this, finally, has done the trick and Child Two is now in the happy position of being slightly bored with lying in state on the sofa watching CBBC. I hope her liver is ok.

What I really should have done is simply take the divine Lulu’s advice, and administer hefty doses of this:

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